Winter Blues

I know, the card doesn't fit the title and that's because I'm longing for Spring.  The winter blues is an actual medical condition formally known as Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD).  SAD is a form of depression that occurs primarily in the late fall and winter months due to the shortened daylight hours.  For some, SAD can be quite debilitating.  I was diagnosed with SAD a few years ago and it has hit me hard this year.  Over the past few weeks I have noticed my moods going in a downward trend.  When I'm not at work, it is very difficult to get out of bed or off the couch.  I feel like all of my energy has been mysteriously zapped from my body.  Sometimes it even hurts to move.  Things that I normally take a great interest in just leave me feeling blah.  I haven't gone to my church or Bible studies in several weeks.  The real unfortunate thing is I haven't been missed.

In the Fall I did let the ladies of my Bible Study know that I suffer from SAD and that I tend to get depressed and lonely.  I put in several prayer requests at my church about this too.  I'm disappointed to say that none of my "friends" have called or emailed me to see how I am doing.  No one has noticed my absence from 3rd row center at church on Sundays, nor have my "friends" from the Bible study I was a part of noticed.  I am fortunate to have at least 2 true friends, Abena and Susanna, who noticed the change in my moods and withdrawing from usual activities.  Abena and Susanna have truly been showing me Christ's love.  I wish I could say the same for the many others who have said they are my "friends".

Earlier this week I was very angry.  The fact that I cared enough to be angry is a good sign.  I was sad and angry that I was so alone.  I was angry that I had notified several people that I may need help and prayers and yet I was ignored.  I'm disappointed in the people at my church and Bible study but I'm not disappointed with God.  The past 2 days I had the strength to read a chapter of the Bible each day.  God showed me that I must forgive them.  I'm no longer angry, but I'm still disappointed in them.  I know God will not let me go through something that is too much to bear and that He is always with me, even in my darkest times.  Maybe He is allowing me to go through this for the benefit of others. 

Yesterday I was able to enter my craft room and work on a card.  I went to a stamping meeting last night and had a lot of fun.  I'm at my computer now writing this entry and posting my card.  Am I free from depression now?  No.  I have some good days and bad ones during the winter.  I believe what helped is having people who really care contact me, pray for me and offer their companionship and assistance.  I'm not writing this to put down the people at my church or Bible study (I doubt any of them read my blog anyway) but I'm writing this in hopes that it will make people aware of those around them who may suffer from depression.  I hope you who are reading this will have those around you who are lonely or depressed brought to your minds.  Please don't ignore us!  We need real friends.  We need the body of Christ to come around us and encourage us.  If you don't see us for a while, please give us a call or send us an email.  We need to know that people do care.  Be real friends like Abena and Susanna are to me.

Isaiah 26:3-4 "You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you.  Trust in the LORD forever, for the LORD GOD is an everlasting rock."

Card Recipe:
Stamps:  Elisabeth Bell
Paper:  WW, Lucky Limeade, Calypso Coral, Pool Party, DP - DCWV
Ink:  Stazon Black, Pool Party
Accessories:  Prisma Colored Pencils, Goo-Gone, Cricut, Blending Stumps, Border Punch, Mulberry Flowers